Let Me Love You Again
Chapter 91

Nate

The bedroom was completely dark, if not for a crack that came from the space between a curtain and the other. Maya was lying on the bed next to her, and I walked over to her.

I knelt before her, her eyes open and red with tears. I pulled strands of her hair from her face and stroked her cheek with my thumb. Maya’s eyes were lost in the air, and when I touched her, her red grey eyes were pointing at mine. As soon as our looks met, her eyes filled with tears again and she began to sob.

“I want my baby,” she said in a hoarse voice between hiccups.

It broke my heart, even more, to see her in that state, knowing that I couldn’t do anything, I was powerless as never before in my life. She felt her eyes wet and I couldn’t stop crying anymore, I put my forehead on the mattress and started sobbing.

She felt Maya put her hands in my hair “Nate”

“I don’t know what to do, I’m powerless, I feel useless,” I said.

“It’s not your fault,” Maya said as she sat on the bed.

I lifted up my head and looked at her for a moment, then placed my head on her lap and embraced her, weeping with her.

I felt like a part of me had been taken away from me, I needed my child, I couldn’t breathe at the thought of someone else being with him, I couldn’t breathe at the thought of him not being able to eat, sleep without us.

I didn’t know how to do it, I didn’t know who I was, what I was doing, I just felt a huge emptiness inside of me that couldn’t be filled with anything but Axel’s presence here right now. I could feel my heartbreaking.

Jess

My mother came out of Nate and Maya’s room and met me at the table, while I was going through all the files of the case, it was going to be a very long night and soon Andrew would also come with the children to make them eat.

At that moment I couldn’t stay at home, knowing that my brother and my best friend were completely broken.

“How is it possible that a small request for a hearing from a judge has turned into a review by social workers?” I said by reading the social workers’ document.

“They’re vultures,” Chris replied.

“Do we have names?” I asked and my father nodded.

My mother opened the fridge and took some water and then put it in the middle of the table where we were all working.

“How are they?” I asked her.

“Both under sedatives. Nate was having a panic attack,” my mother sighed.

“Did you call your contacts?” I asked Zeke.

“Tomorrow morning he will be transferred to them, as soon as he is with them I can update you,” he replied.

“I think that nothing can be done but wait for the news tomorrow,” said my father, “Thank you for having responded to my call” continued Chris and Zeke.

They both got up and took their things “I want you to keep the situation under control, leave any other case you have, I know it looks bad, but this has priority, we have to make sure that all the documentation turns out as soon as possible, bring the f*****g adoption certificate to the judge if necessary, We need to unblock this situation as quickly as possible. Axel can’t be with strangers for too long,” I said seriously.

“Call Lucas and ask him if he will be able to go to the new group home in the next few days, I will try to get him a permit from the judge as a childhood educator,” my father told me.

I nodded and picked up the phone, ready to call Lucas. Fortunately, Lucas was already an educator and worked in kindergartens, which gave us more freedom to use it to keep an eye on Axel. We all knew how wary he was of strangers, and we were all afraid that he might refuse even to eat if there were neither May nor my brother with him, we knew how attached he was to his parents and how much they depended on him.

Which led me to worry about them again. All this stress was so bad for Maya, especially in her condition, I didn’t want anything to happen to her or the baby. I was worried about Axel. Not knowing where he was or how he was leading everyone into a vortex of pain that was hard to calm.

Zeke and Chris went out and at that moment Andrew walked in with the children blissfully asleep in the stroller.

“Are you sure it wasn’t a request from Brad? It would make more sense than to get custody he sought the help of social workers,” I said to my father under my breath.

My father shook his head “The request made by his lawyer was for a custody agreement, not a warning or an inability to raise the child”.

“As soon as the matter is resolved, I want the names of these social workers,” I said with clenched teeth.

Maya and Nate’s little apartment was still full of people. My parents and Maya’s were in the kitchen, while my father continued to work non-stop, trying to get news of how Axel was doing.

I sat on the couch and picked up Liam in my arms, and I started nursing him when I called Lucas.

“Jess” he immediately replied, “Tell me you have some good news”.

“We’re trying to move him to a group home that we know, you have to give me your availability for the next few days, with the judge’s permission you can go there and keep an eye on Axel,” I said as I cradled Liam.

“I’ll do everything I can, I’ll tie myself to the ladder and sleep there if I have to,” he said, “How is Maya?” he asked.

Liam had finished eating so I passed it to Andrew and went out into the hallway on the floor.

“She’s broken, they gave her a sedative to calm her down, which is not easy since she’s pregnant,” I said sitting on the steps.

“Is she pregnant?!” almost shouted Lucas on his cell phone, “How many weeks?”

“Almost fourteen”

“s**t, all this stress is not good for her”

I sighed and put my hand on my face.

“Nate?” asked Lucas.

“Devastated, Maya’s father gave him a sedative too, they’re both in the bedroom sleeping,” I said.

“Do you want me to come and relieve you?”

I sigh “No better not, the apartment is already full so try to keep your phone on all the time okay?”

“Okay. Let me know how they are,” Lucas replied.

“Yes” and hang up.

I got up and went back into the house, finding Andrew with Emma in his arms, immediately handed her to me and I began to nurse her as I moved around the house. I approached Nate and Maya’s room, the door was ajar, so I opened it a little bit and I looked at them. The room was dark except for a glimmer of light coming from the curtains.

May and Nate were asleep in each others arms, both were still dressed, and I felt a pinch in my heart as I saw them that way, knowing how much pain was eating them, made me choke on my stomach and hold Emma tighter in my arms. I wanted to do something to help them, I wanted to take that pain away, but we all knew it was impossible.

Only Axel’s presence in that house would have made them feel better, and I, like everyone else, would have found no peace until we brought Axel back to that house.