Let Me Love You Again
Chapter 54

Maya

Nate parked his car in front of his parents’ house and turned off the engine. Axel made verses in his car seat as he played happily with the two little toys that Nate had left in his hand.

I took a deep breath and looked at the Dare’s house, the house in which I had spent many days of my childhood.

That day seemed to be wonderful and I was sure that Mrs. Dare had prepared the table in the garden and lunch with bows.

I sighed to think of the cyclone called Jess, which was about to hit me.

“If you want, we can go home and f**k all day, I wouldn’t complain at all, on the contrary,” Nate offered laughing.

“Don’t be a jerk,” I said, looking out.

“What’s up, mon amour?” Nate came over and brushed my cheek, then moved my hair behind my ear.

“Can you talk to your father about Axel?” I asked, turning around to look at him.

Nate frowned, “I told you I would,” he replied.

“Can you do it today? I don’t want to waste time,” I insisted.

“What is it?” he asked, “What are you hiding?”.

I looked straight at him in the twinkling blue eyes and worried, my l*p trembled and I felt a bite in the mouth of my stomach, the fear that gripped my bowels with a sharp and burning blade.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, leaning against Nate’s hand on my cheek.

“Yesterday I saw Brad,” I said in one breath.

I felt Nate’s hand stiffen and the air in the car changed immediately. I opened his eyes and I looked at him. Nate had grown dark and tense like a violin string.

“Where?” he asked with clenched teeth.

“When I was on my way to Jess’s date.”

“What did he say?”

“Nothing, he didn’t see me, but I saw him. What would happen if he came for Axel? What would happen if he took me to court for his custody?” I asked with a thread of my voice.

“It would happen that a judge could agree with him, he could get the custody. Damn Maya! Because you didn’t get him to sign any papers after he was born, so you’d have custody!” he suddenly blurted.

Nate grabbed the steering wheel hard and trembled, then looked up at the rearview mirror to watch Axel continue to make verses and play in his car seat.

“I haven’t had any contact with him since we broke up, he’s never been interested in me or Axel. When he was born I didn’t think about anything, I didn’t think about anything, I… I didn’t know,” I said, leaning my head against the seat and feeling the tears start to come out of my eyes, “Can he really do that? Can he take him away?” I asked with a broken voice.

“If he sues you in court and claims to be his father, with a positive DNA test he could accuse you of hiding him and the judge would agree with him”.

My heart stopped and my breath cut into my throat “It can’t be true”.

“Hey,” Nate untied his belt and walked up to me, grabbed my face in his hands, and forced me to look him in the eye, “I’m not letting anything and nobody get close to him, okay? I’ll talk to Dad and we’ll figure it out, okay?”.

I nodded and closed my eyes as Nate’s lips brushed against mine. He wiped my tears and rubbed his nose against mine.

“It’ll be okay,” he whispered.

I looked him in the eye and gave myself over to him. I felt safe as if nothing could happen to me in his presence. But Brad’s ghost was hovering over us and threatening to ruin everything I had built and rebuilt after he destroyed me and tore me to pieces. I never would have let him take Axel, I hadn’t worked so hard to let him take him away.

Axel may have had his b***d, but he wasn’t his son, Brad had never been his father, and he never would have been. Nate was the man who occupied that place, not just for me but for Axel himself. Nate loved him like he was his own flesh and b***d, and so did my baby. He loved him so much that his first word was Dada. No one would destroy my family, I would not allow it. I would struggle with my teeth and my nails to keep them intact.

“Dada!” Axel suddenly shouted cheerfully.

“I’ll never let that happen,” Nate said more to himself than to me.

I nodded and I untied my belt as Nate got out of the car and took Axel happy to be in the arms of what he really considered his father. No, Brad would never ruin that.

I got out of the car, too, and I grabbed Nate’s hand as we drove to his parents’ house together.

I closed the gate and together we went through the front garden and then we went towards the back one from which there was cheerful laughter.

Nate held Axel with one arm while the other hand had tucked it into his pocket, extending the elbow in which I slipped my arm, the hand with the engagement ring was resting on his forearm, the glow shining under the sun’s rays.

“Are you ready to face the excitement of a hormonal Jess and Lucas?” he whispered, kissing me on the temple.

“f**k,” I said, “I forgot about Lucas.”

“I bet he’ll have a notebook full of notes for your wedding just like he had for Jess,” Nate laughed.

“Too bad he won’t use it. I don’t want a big wedding,” I said, and he froze, I looked at him, “Do you want a big wedding?” I asked a little intimidated.

My dream had never been to have a wedding full of hundreds and hundreds of people, old relatives I had never seen. I had always dreamed of an intimate wedding. In my dreams, there had always been the idea of a small ceremony, on a beach at sunset, me in a simple dress and the man of my life in front of me, both barefoot, the sand between our fingers, while we swore eternal love to each other and united our lives forever.

My heart stopped and my breath cut into my throat “It can’t be true”.

“I didn’t think I could love you more, but I swear, if we weren’t at my parents’ house and I didn’t have Axel in my arms, I would strip you off on the lawn and f**k you until you yelled at me, I do,” he said in a hoarse voice.

I immediately became inflamed and bit my lower l*p, “Don’t say certain things if you can’t do them” I answered in a hoarse voice.

Nate leaned toward my ear, “Later,” he said, brushing his teeth on my skin, making me shiver all over my body.

“Dada” Axel came in with an air of reproach.

“Yes, I understood,” Nate replied, starting to walk again as he kissed Axel’s blonde head.

We went into the back garden. Under the gazebo, a big table had been prepared around which everyone was already sitting.

Jess held a hand on her rounded belly and looked happy and serene, as I had not seen her for months now and I couldn’t wait for the day of the party to discover the s*x of the twins. Lucas and I hadn’t opened the answer envelope yet. We were going to do it at the last minute so we wouldn’t have to hide it for too long.

Nate and I walked up to the table and Lucas immediately slapped “The morning s*x marathon made you late!” with his head pointed to the marks on my neck that had left Nate and my core trobbed to the memory of that fiery night that we had just passed.

“Can we not talk about my brother’s s*x life,” Jess replied as I hid my face in Nate’s chest.

“But if it’s the most interesting thing of all! Do you know how many years May and I have been drooling over him? Do you know how many times we bet on the length of his p***s? And the erotic dreams about him! And the lucky lady here could touch with her hand and mouth all that goodness!” said Lucas, almost unworthy.

“Lucas!” Jess and I shouted in unison.

“Thank you, eh,” Devon said, offended, crossing his arms across his chest.

“You’re not just my erotic dream, babe, if my f*****g daily flag-raising”

“You should record yourself talking, so you’d know what you’re saying,” I said.

Together we all laughed as Mrs. Dare arrived with a cheery singing tray, we were all immersed in our speeches when Jess interrupted the peace.

“What is that, May May?!”she shouted, suddenly making me jump.