Butterscotch Souls: The Morningstar Series: Book 4
Butterscotch Souls – Chapter 23

“You better have been thinking of me, mate.” Ambrose said in that deep voice.

“I, uhm, I.” I stuttered over my words.

This is so embarrassing. My face has to be as red as a tomato at this point.

Ambrose walked around the tub so that he’s behind me. He’s back in his clothes now, much to my dismay. Ambrose kneeled down and I could feel his hot breath fan the side of my neck.

“Don’t be embarrassed baby. It’s f*****g hot to walk in on you touching yourself. I even got to see the ending and that’s the best part.” He whispered in my ear and then kissed my neck.

“Even submerged in the water your scent still fills the room. So sweet..” He mumbled against my skin.

“W-Where’s Tate?” I asked a bit breathlessly.

“Asleep. The shift took a lot out of him, which is why I saved it for last.” He told me.

I only nodded in response.

“Now, I want to watch you do that again. From the beginning this time.” He said as he grabbed my hand and ran it down my body.

“You.. you want to watch me touch myself?” I asked.

Ambrose nodded.

“We all have our fantasies.” He said and then began kissing my neck again.

Ambrose lead my hand to my core. Thankfully he’s wearing a T-shirt so his arms getting wet isn’t a big deal. Not that I think he would care right now anyways.

My fingers began to circle my clit and Ambrose moved his hand up my body. His hand came up to my breast and pinched my n****e.

Ambrose’s other hand came to my other n****e. He twisted and pinched my n*****s causing a bunch of noises to leave my lips. Ambrose sucked and licked up and down my neck as I worked my fingers.

“You smell so f*****g good baby.” He whispered. “Don’t stop touching yourself.” He ordered me and then sucked on my neck again.

“Tell me Epperly, what were you thinking about when you were touching yourself before I came in?” He asked.

“Yo-you want-t m-me to tell you?” I stuttered out as more noises spilled out of me.

“Mhmmmm.” Ambrose hummed against my neck making me shiver. “I want to know what worked you up enough to c*m like that.” He said and then pinched and pulled my n*****s making a louder noise come from me.

“Your m***s are so f*****g sexy.” Ambrose whispered in my ear.

I’m moaning?

That must be what these noises are that I’m making.

“Now, tell me.” Ambrose ordered and my body shivered.

“I was thinking about you..” I said and then m****d again.

Ambrose worked my n*****s and the sensations from the sparks shooting through my body had my hand slowing.

“Ah ah ah, can’t have that.” He said as he moved my hand back to my clit.

This time he kept his hand on top of mine and moved my fingers for me.

“What about me were you thinking about love?”

“I… I.. Oh.” I m****d out as he he dipped his fingers inside of me.

“You like that do you?” He asked.

I nodded.

“I’ll keep going as long as you keep playing with your clit.” He told me and I continued to cirlce my clit.

“That’s it baby, just like that.” He mumbled agaisnt my skin as he pumped two fingers inside of me.

“Now, I believe you were saying something.” He urged me to go on.

“I was.. thinking.. about our…uh.. our first night together.” I finally pushed the words out.

Ambrose chuckled.

“You remember how good I made you feel?” He asked.

I nodded and closed my eyes.

“The way your lips felt.. And your body.. Uhhh yes.” I m****d out as Ambrose pumped into me faster. “Your sexy voice and how deep it gets. The way your eyes darken when you get horny. How….how good you always make me feel.. I… ugh..I.. Ambrose..” I m****d out as he got faster and faster.

“That’s right baby. Keep saying my name.” He ordered in my ear.

“Ambrose… Uhh! Don’t stop Ambrose!” I m****d loudly.

Ambrose’s breathing grew heavier against my skin. His fingers pumped in and out of me while I rubbed my clit. I m****d his name over and over again as I got lost in the feeling.

Every nerve ending in my body is buzzing and I felt the o****m build up inside of me. I leaned my head all the way back and used my free hand to hook around his neck. Then I brought his head down to connect our lips. I m****d into his mouth and his fingers moved impossibly fast, just like this morning.

The o****m built and built until finally, it broke through. I m****d even louder into his mouth and gripped the back of his neck tightly. Ambrose slowed his motions but kept going as I rode out my o****m. After a few moments Ambrose pulled his fingers from my body and moved his head away from mine.

“That was hot as f**k baby.” He said as he smiled down at me. All I could do was nod.

Ambrose stood up and grabbed a towel for me. He held it open and waited for me to stand. Once I did he wrapped the towel around me and I wrapped my arms around his neck. I stood up on my tippy toes and tried to k**s him but he wouldn’t come the rest of the way down.

So, I kissed his neck instead.

“Epperly..” He whispered out my name.

“Hmmm?” I hummed out against his skin.

Then my tongue darted out to run across him.

“Epperly it’s late baby.” He told me.

I pulled away and looked into his eyes.

“Okay.” I said softly as I faught back the embarrassment that was threatening to show on my face.

I reached around to grab my towel from him and then I turned it around and held it to my chest. Without looking into his face I walked around him and out of the bathroom. Ambrose followed me into our bedroom and I went straight to my closet. I could feel mates eyes on me as I sifted through my dresser drawers trying to find some pjs.

“You can sleep in one of my shirts again if you want to.” Ambrose suggested from the doorway.

I shook my head.

“I should probably wear my own things.” I said as I pulled out a pair of shorts and a thin cotton tank top.

Then I turned my back to Ambrose and dropped my towel to put my clothes on. I could feel Ambrose still watching me but I tried to ignore him. My ego had taken a hit.

Earlier I was thinking that maybe I had done something wrong and that was the real reason why he wouldn’t sleep with me. But he still makes me c*m, and touches me, and says things that make me think he does. And then when I try to touch him back he pushes me away.

Is it really because he wants to wait to mark me?

As far as I knew werewolves usually couldn’t wait to mark their mates. And it wasn’t like I wasn’t willing.

Does he maybe not want to mark me? Is he still mad at me for leaving him five years ago? I wouldn’t blame him if he was…

Maybe I deserve this type of frustration.

“Epperly… Are you okay?” Ambrose asked me as I walked past him and to our bed.

“Mhm.” I said without looking at him.

“Epp..” Ambrose said my name softly. “I can tell that something is wrong.” He said.

I shrugged.

“Nope, just getting ready for bed. You have an early day tomorrow and Tate has his first day of school.” I said and then got into our bed and pulled the covers over me.

Ambrose let out a deep sigh from where ever he was in the room. I closed my eyes and heard him shuffle closer to me. Then I felt his soft lips press to my forehead and I almost cried.

It’s not fair that it feels so good when he touches me but he won’t let me touch him. My heart and my head are confused.

Maybe he doesn’t want me after everything that I told him but the bond won’t let him let me go? If that was the case would he really be so nice to me?

“I’m going to take a quick shower.” He said softly.

“Kay.” I mumbled without opening my eyes.

Ambrose let out another sigh and a minute later I heard the bathroom door shut softly. My eyes opened and I felt tears well up. I don’t even care what the marks come with, I want all of them as long as they are from Ambrose. I want anything that would make me closer to him.

After spending five years without him I don’t want to go another second. I didn’t know for those five years how much I was really craving him. I had no idea that I was missing him. Not until I saw him again.

Then everything fell into place. Even if I was scared at the time. My world was brighter and safer. Now I might lose all of that.

I have no idea if Ambrose is punishing me for leaving him, or if he just doesn’t want me. He sends me mixed signals but I have no idea if that’s due to the mate bond or not.

When Angela told me about mates she explained how strong the pull of the bond is. Angela said that werewolves have the hardest time refraining after meeting their mates.

Ambrose is a werewolf, how is he able to deny me so easily? Especially when I can’t resist him, when I push myself on him?

The only thing I can come up with is that he doesn’t want me.

Maybe I can change that. Maybe I can somehow seduce him into sleeping with me. Then he can mark me and everything else will fall into place. Right?

I’m sure I can do that. If he’s feeling the bond like I am I think I could seduce him into marking me. Then he would always be mine, forever.

Just as I made up my mind the bathroom door opened. I turned over on the bed and watched Ambrose walk out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, hanging low. I gupled as my eyes drank in his body.

Droplets of water were still sliding down his hard body. I watched a few of them disappear under the towel and knew that I was wet. Ambrose stared at me for a moment before speaking.

“Sorry if I woke you.” He said softly.

I shook my head and sat up.

“You didn’t.” I said. “I can’t sleep.”

“No?” He asked and I shook my head. “Something on your mind?”

I shrugged as my eyes trailed down his body.

“One thing is for sure.” I said in what I hoped is a seductive voice. “Can I have a goodnight k**s?” I asked with a pout.

Ambrose chuckled at me.

“Yeah just let me put something on.” He said as he started to walk to his closet.

“Wait!” I said a little too quickly.

Ambrose turned around and raised a brow at me.

“I just… am impatient. I want a k**s right now and after you put clothes on.” I said with a sweet smile.

“But I’m still dripping, what if I get you wet?” He asked.

“Believe me, it’s too late for that.” I mumbled.

“What?” Ambrose asked as he chuckled.

I cleared my throat.

“Nothing, just, come here.” I said and then flipped the blankets off of me and swung my legs over the side.

Ambrose chuckled again as he walked around the bed to me. I smiled up at him as I leaned back on my hands. Ambrose stepped between my legs and then bent down slowly to me.

Finally his lips brushed against mine. My breath hitched and then Ambrose pressed his lips to mine fully. As he did so, I snatched the towel from his body and threw it behind me. But then my mate pulled his lips away from mine.

“What are you trying to do Epperly?” He asked amused. “I thought you wanted a k**s.” He said.

“I want a lot of things from you.” I whispered as I hooked my arms around his neck and pulled him back to my lips.

Ambrose kissed me back for a total of two seconds before pulling away again. I tried to connect our lips again and managed to for a second before Ambrose pulled away.

This time he reached up and unhooked my arms from his body. He placed my hands in my lap and stood back up. His hard, thick member staring me in the face. I licked my lips.

“Epperly you should get some sleep.” Ambrose told me.

I looked up and fluttered my eye lashes at him.

“But I’m not tired. Maybe you can help with that.” I smiled sweetly.

Ambrose’s body shuttered and he shook his head.

“No baby, we both need sleep.” He said as he walked around the bed and to his closet.

I pouted.

Okay so that didn’t work, but I have other things to try. Things I’ve only ever fantasized about. Although, this did hurt my ego again.

Am I maybe not good at it? I thought that night together was special, was I wrong? Was it not good for Ambrose the way it was for me? Maybe he was disappointed in who his mate is?

I mean he was so eager to jump into bed with me the frist time we met, now… Now it’s like I have some sort of disease.

A moment later Ambrose walked out of his closet in a pair of blue and red plaid boxers. He smiled at me as he crawled into our bed. I hovered my face over him and then kissed him. As soon as I tried to deepen it though, Ambrose pulled away. Pouting I rolled over onto my side. Ambrose slung an arm over me and cuddled up to my back.

Gods, I hope that he wants me.

*********************************************

I woke up the next morning to an awful sound. It sounds like an alarm but a million times more annoying. I g*****d and rolled over. My arm spread across a very broad and warm chest. The noise stopped and I tucked my face into Ambrose’s neck and sighed.

Perfect.

Ambrose chuckled making his body rumble.

“I gotta get up and get ready for work my love.” He said softly. “And you should get Tate up and ready. I know you wanted to.” He said.

I g*****d.

“Five more minutes.” I complained.

Ambrose chuckled again.

“No can do babe. We have to drop Tate off at his class before I go to the training grounds.” He told me.

Reluctantly I rolled off of Ambrose.

“Fine.” I g*****d out and then rubbed my eyes.

Ambrose kissed me cheek and then got out of bed. I watched as he walked into our bathroom to do his morning buisness. Forcing myself to get out of bed I walked to my closet and picked out some clothes. Skinny jeans and a cropped black shirt.

Grabbing underwear and a bra I threw the clothes onto the bed and went into the bathroom. I went pee, in front of my mate which was strange, and brushed my teeth.

Then I got dressed.

“That’s what you’re wearing today?” Ambrose asked as he came out of his closet wearing his usual jeans and plain black T-shirt.

I looked down at myself before looking back at him.

“Something wrong with it?” I asked confused.

Ambrose walked up to me and lightly brushed his fingers across my mid section, causing a shiver to run through my body.

“Shows a lot of skin.” He mumbled. “You should put on a different shirt.” He suggested.

I frowned. “Why?” I asked.

“Because it shows too much skin.” He said like it was obvious, then turned to walk out of the bedroom.

I stood there dumbfounded for a moment. Do I not look good? I showed more skin the first time we met and he didn’t say anything then. Is it because I’m a mother now? f**k that.

I’m still a person and I spent over half of my life covered in scars. No way in hell was I going to hide my body now. Especially not when my own mate doesn’t want to give me attention.

If the one person programmed to think I’m sexy doesn’t, then I doubt anyone else would. Okay, that thought hurt. I wonder if that is what this is about.

Am I not attractive to Ambrose?

Shaking the bad thoughts from my head I walked out of the room and into Tates. I woke Tate up and while he was waking I pulled out some clothes for him.

Tate was egar to get to school so I didn’t have too much trouble getting him ready. He has a whole new back pack with all kinds of school supplies hanging on a hook in his room. Tate grabbed the bag and booked it down the hall. I had to take a deep breath before following after him.

I’m starting to feel like this is going to be a mess.

When I came out of the hall Ambrose had just set our plates down at the table. He made a simple breakfast of eggs and toast. Ambrose also got Tate a couple of b***d bags to have before school. If nothing else, at least he’s a good father.

“I thought you were going to change?” Ambrose asked once he noticed me.

I shook my head.

“No, you told me to change and then left the room. I am perfectly fine showing some of my skin. I like the way I look.” I said and then took my seat.

“Uhmm..” Ambrose trailed off awkwardly. “Epp come talk to me in our room.” He said softly.

I looked up at him and frowned. Ambrose gave me a hard look that told me I better go with him. I stood up and started to walk to our bedroom.

“We will be right back Tate, go ahead and keep eating.” Ambrose said to him.

“Okay Daddy.” Tate replied happily.

I walked back to the bedroom I share with my mate and walked in. Then I sat on the bed and crossed my arms. I feel like a child about to get a talking to. Ambrose came through the doorway and then shut the door.

“Epperly, I need you to change.” He said sternly.

I narrowed my eyes at him.

“Are you telling me what to do?” I asked accusingly.

Ambrose shook his head.

“You don’t understand.” He said and my eyes went wide.

“What the f**k is that supposed to mean?” I asked.

My mates deep blue eyes snapped to mine.

“You don’t know what it’s like for me to have you walking around looking like that all day. Especially when I won’t be with you.” He said with a hard voice.

“Looking like this?” I asked confused. “It’s just a crop top. And it’s not even tight, it’s loose and baggy. It’s just a shirt Ambrose. You act like I’m out here dressed like a hooker or something.” I said angrily and then stood to my feet.

“Look, if you don’t like what you see then don’t look at me. I’m dressing however I want to.” I said and then tried to walk past him.

Ambrose grabbed my arm and turned me around. He pinned me to the door and then put his arms up to box me in. My heart beat faster and my core heated. Wow, not the f*****g time for this, stupid body.

“You will f*****g change that shirt or you won’t leave this house.” He said dangerously and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

I looked up into his angry eyes.

“You’re really that embarrassed by me?” I whispered as tears welled in my eyes.

“What?” Ambrosed asked with a confused look.

I looked away from his face.

“Nothing.” I said back. “I’ll change.” I said and then ducked under his arm and to my closet.

“Epperly.” Ambrose said but I was already in the closet with the door shut behind me.

Tears were already falling down my cheeks.

“I, uhm, I just need a moment to pick something out.” I said. Girls do that right? Take forever to decide what to wear? “Can you help Tate finish getting ready please? I’ll be out in a moment.” I said and hoped that he couldn’t hear me crying through all of that.

“Epperly we should talk about what you said.” Ambrose said softly and I felt more tears come.

“We can talk later. Our son is more important right now.” I said.

“Okay.” He said softly before leaving.

Honestly, I don’t want to talk about it. I’m too afraid for Ambrose to confirm that I am an embarrassment to him. How could I even blame him?

I’m a freak even to the supernatrual world. Who would ever want to be mated to me? I just have to stick with the plan. Seduce Ambrose into marking me.

Once I have his marks the rest will fall into place. Maybe if I learn more about this world he won’t be as embarrassed by me. I should find Tia and see if she’ll let me into the archives after Ambrose heads to work.

Wiping my tears from my eyes I grabbed a random shirt from a hanger and changed. This shirt is a plain baby blue V-neck shirt. At least this is cute too. Then I walked out of the closet and to the bathroom. I had to make sure it wasn’t obvious that I was just crying.

When I walked out of my bedroom I found Tate and Ambrose at the front door. Ambrose was on the ground helping Tate with his new boots. When Tate noticed me his face light up. At least I can always count on my son to be happy to have me.

“Mommy!” Tate shouted.

Ambrose didn’t even look up at me.

“Hi, baby.” I said to Tate with my best fake smile. “Are you excited for your first day of school?” I asked him.

“Yes!” Tate shouted. “Ziggy said that he would wait for me outside the classroom so that I don’t have to walk in alone. Isn’t that nice Mommy?”

“Yes baby very nice.” I said.

Ambrose handed me my pair of new sneakers before putting his own boots on.

“We don’t have time for you to eat but after we drop Tate off you can go to the kitchen and get something.” Ambrose said.

“Okay.” I said softly.

He still wouldn’t look at me. Fucker made me change and won’t even look at me to confirm that I did. I didn’t even have to bother to clean myself up after crying. Ambrose wouldn’t have noticed.

Did I really f**k up that badly?

“Alright buddy you ready?” Ambrose asked Tate with a huge smile.

“Yeah!” Tate shouted making Ambrose chuckle.

Ambrose opened the front door and let Tate and I walk out first. I grabbed Tate’s hand and we walked down the steps. We waited for Ambrose to join us. Without sparing me a glance Ambrose grabbed Tate’s other hand and we started walking to the school. Okay, guess I’m not even getting my hand held. I tried to not let it bother me but it does.

A lot.

Tate chatted the whole way to the school, and thankfully Ambrose was able to hold the conversation. I was not. My mind was everywhere.

Once we got to the classroom Ziggy was waiting outside for Tate. His little face light up once he caught sight of Tate and it took them a total of five seconds to run off. The teacher I met yesterday talked with Ambrose and I for a few moments before class started.

After that Ambrose practically ran off in the opposite direction. At least it felt that way. I was definitely running to keep up with his long strides.

“Here’s the kitchen. I have to go, I’m running really late and I am never late.” He said and then left me in front of the double doors.

“I-I-I hope you have a good day!” I tried to call after him but I don’t think he heard me.

My heart hurts. He didn’t even k**s me goodbye. Not even a k**s on the cheek. He didn’t even look at me.

Was he that mad about the shirt still? Or is he mad that I made him late? If I hadn’t taken the time to argue about the stupid shirt or cry then he wouldn’t be running late.

Gods, I’m so bad at this.

All of this. Being a mate, a mother, a person. Maybe Tate and Ambrose would be better off without me here. They wouldn’t be in danger. Tate would be safe. But, I can’t leave them. Not until I at least try everything that I can first.

“Oh, hey Epperly.” Belle said from beside me.

I turned my head to see her walking up to me.

“Hi Belle.” I greeted back with a smile.

“You look lost.” She said with a laugh. “Anything I can help you with?” She asked.

“Actually yeah. I was wondering if you could help me find Tia. Ambrose said there’s an archives here and I would love to do some reading.” I told her.

“Oh I can take you there. Let’s go.” She said.

This is it. I can learn everything I can about this world. Then Ambrose won’t be embarrassed about me anymore. I can make him proud and happy the way he makes me feel. This can work.

It has to work.